Attention drivers and pedestrians of Cork! Government has announced a new regulation that will change the way we experience traffic jams forever. Starting next week, a new program called “Traffic Jam Meditation” will be introduced on the busiest streets of Cork.

According to a spokesperson for the Government, the program is designed to alleviate the stress and frustration that comes with being stuck in traffic:

“We know that traffic jams can be a real headache for drivers and pedestrians alike, that’s why we’re excited to introduce this new program, which we believe will help people to stay calm and centred during their commute.”

So how does Traffic Jam Meditation work? According to the council, it’s simple: when drivers and pedestrians are stuck in a traffic jam, they will be directed to tune into a specific radio station that will play soothing music and guided meditation exercises. The exercises will be led by local yoga teachers and mindfulness experts, who will offer techniques to help drivers and pedestrians to relax and let go of their frustration.

The program will be introduced gradually on the busiest streets of Cork, with full implementation expected by the end of the year. Council officials say that the response from the public has been overwhelmingly positive so far, with many people expressing excitement about the program.

“We’re really excited to see how this program will change the way we experience traffic jams in Cork, said the Government spokesperson. We believe that by taking a few minutes to meditate during a traffic jam, people will be able to arrive at their destination feeling more relaxed and refreshed. We can’t wait to hear what people think!”

While some people might be skeptical about the effectiveness of Traffic Jam Meditation, others are already embracing the idea. “I think this is a great idea,” said local resident Sarah Murphy. “I always feel so stressed when I’m stuck in traffic, so anything that can help me relax is welcome. I’m definitely going to give it a try!”

So there you have it, folks. Government is introducing a new regulation that will change the way we experience traffic jams forever. Whether you’re a driver or a pedestrian, you’ll soon be able to take a few minutes to relax and meditate during your daily commute. If you haven’t gathered, this is a joke. Happy April Fools’ Day!